and there can only be one

so its been awhile sense i have posted anything......not much has happen between now and then still working my ass off and hanging out with alayna (which hasnt been to much fun) we have nothing to talk about and im so fucking nervous when im around her i dont know what to say or do. im afraid ill say something stupid or do something stupid and in turn she would think im stupid *sigh*. I think if we hung out more i would be less nervous and act more like myself around her but that has a downside also...... i'm not sure if she would wanna hangout more i dont know why she would im a boring person. wish i could change that. i hate always assuming the worse but if you always assume the worse you wont be hurt as much as if you would assume the best. If i could get rid of these feeling's without loosing another friend i would but anyways enough with that. vacation is coming up cant fucking wait get out of here and not worrying about anything for a week. anyways i just want to say one last thing FUCK OFF!!!!

Dashboard Confessional - Broken Hearts And Concrete Floors

I'm always assuming the worst
But you're going on none the less
And there's nothing to cushion your heart
led fall
Letters from further away
Keep pulling me close to home
And they're something to cushion my callous sighs

And I know that you hope for
Longer goodbyes
Embracing for forever
And falling in your eyes
In your eyes
Your eyes

Pouring over photographs
I'm living in your letters
Breath deeply from this envelope, it smells like you
And I can't be without that scent, it's filling me
With all you mean to me
To me

Continually failing these trials
But you stand by me none the less
And you won't let me sink though I'm begging you
I'm begging you

Phone calls from further away
And messages on my machine
But I don't ever tell you this distance seems terrible

There's no need to test my heart
With useless space
These roads go on forever
There'll always be a place
For you, in my heart

So I'll hit the pavement, it's gotta be better then waiting
And pushing you far away cause I'm scared
So I'll take my chances and head on my way up there
Cause turning to you is like falling in love when you're ten